Saturday, September 12, 2009

Praxis

praxis is defined as: 1.practice, as distinguished from theory; application or use, as of knowledge or skills. 2.convention, habit, or custom. 3.a set of examples for practice.

I’ve been thinking a lot about spiritual practice recently...and more specifically my own spiritual practice as someone who professes to be a follower and disciple of Jesus. Even though I left the institutional church well over a year ago, I continue to feel occasional pangs of nostalgia when I recall what were once fundamental practices associated with my more traditional evangelical experience of Christianity. However it’s also true that the more time that passes, the more people I meet who walk this less traveled path, the more books I read that expound on the lost art of living as a follower as Jesus beyond the walls of the institutional church...the more I am convinced that I am no longer cut out to practice my faith on the inside.


For well over 30 years, practicing my faith as a ‘born-again Christian’ and later an ‘All-in-fully-devoted-follower-of -Jesus’ looked like a tidy concoction of personal sin management coupled with diligent Sunday morning church attendance...sprinkled with random missional field trips and the occasional emotionally driven convention or seminar. Don’t get me wrong, I was devout in my belief system (faith in the sufficiency of Jesus as my ‘personal savior’), but without awareness or intention, my Christian faith practice evolved into professing a system of ‘right-beliefs’(orthodoxy) as well as committing to lining up under a particular church banner and upholding it’s processes and programs. Messages from the pulpit continually reinforced that maturity in Christ could be boiled down to a few tangible specifics...(sin management, regular attendance, tithing 10% and serving inside the walls of the church) and in all honesty, until just recently, I was satisfied with that. At one time...I could not imagine or predict becoming restless or questioning the validity of what I was doing...or what we as American Christians as a whole were doing, but somehow the whole thing came crashing down becoming less and less believable.


Through a series of complicated circumstances...I came to the dazed conclusion that I had to get out of the traditional church environment before I became irreversibly bitter or possibly even an agnostic. Despite my obvious disillusionment with the whole ‘going-to-church’ deal, I was feeling more compelled than ever to‘be the church’ but to my surprise...the institutional model became an impediment to that effort. Fortunately, I met some local ordinary radicals (controversial, subversive believers) attempting community and missional living on the outside of the I.C, who embodied a type of Christian praxis I never knew actually existed beyond the pages of books written by people like Shane Claiborne and Michael Frost. Their incarnational model of Christian practice was so different...obviously liberated from the tidy check-list Christianity I was used to. Embracing this ideal catalyzed a massive paradigm shift in my way of thinking ...and way of practicing!


Eventually even common words and their traditional meanings, once used to express specific spiritual experiences seemed insufficient and in need of being expanded and stretched to convey fuller, deeper and perhaps more authentic meaning. For example, logistically it was obvious, on the ‘outside’ practicing worship could no longer simply mean engaging in a 20 minute prelude of corporate singing and prayer led by a paid professional before a message series commenced. Instead worship had to be more broadly defined and more organic...becoming an attitude and a way of life. Likewise, spiritual maturity could no longer be measured by attendance, tithing or serving the local body as an usher or hospitality specialist. Instead...it becomes a journey rather than a destination...not easily defined but at the very least characterized by living in a posture of service...giving not only financially but more importantly...relationally. Success outside the I.C. will no longer be measured by numbers of attenders, baptisms or decisions for Christ...but instead by the quality of the community...and the depth of our investment in the Kingdom of God and each other, collectively living in the Way of Jesus.


My Christianity at this moment, may seem starkly less ‘spiritual’ to those who remain on the inside...especially when measured by the standards and check lists esteemed in most churches today. I’ve totally thrown that list away...scrapped it and started over! My last days on the inside were exasperating, lacking meaning and depth and far too confining, the routine and process incapable of evoking any joy or positive energy at all. Part of being authentic and listening to God for me at that point, was leaving that all behind. Currently, I feel that my spiritual practice ‘ on the outside’, while more liberating in many ways " is far more costly, difficult and yet rewarding than I ever experienced in 30+ years on the inside and thus, it is for me, more legitimate and precious!"The truth is, it’s harder out here...infinitely more demanding of my time and every other resource I possess, in every area of my life... emotionally, spiritually, relationally and financially.


Christian practice is void without the benefit of community...whether it's accomplished inside or outside of the I.C...is most likely a matter of personal taste. I have decided on the road a little less traveled, at least in the United States of America. My obscure community, Emerging Desert Cohort, is attempting an intentional practice navigating "The Way of Jesus" together, exploring and experiencing life in communitas. FOR REALS. We aren’t in a hurry to define ourselves or outline routine practices. We approach our individual and collective spiritual journeys in obvious and practical ways including (but not limited to) practicing inclusiveness ...having the courage to welcome ALL who want to come, creating a safe environment and making room for the questioners and spiritually fragile...practicing hospitality by sharing our homes and meals as we meet together every week...practicing radical generosity as we consistently invest in the exceptional needs of those outside ourselves, our local community and the global community as well ( no more "stop-drop-and-roll" missions!) These are many of the spiritual practices I have always craved and can now truly give myself to! (plus...we always have great home brewed BEER)


Today, as the last stubborn residue of ‘church--ianity is purged from my life, the deconstruction of what once was becomes less important. I am less fearful of eternal damnation as a result of abandoning a religious system created largely by man. I am less interested in critiquing what went wrong with my old way of doing church and more interested in rediscovering and connecting to the spiritual roots of Christian praxis in the context of relational community. Instead of taking things out and apart, I am ready to re imagine the future. Experimenting with ancient and largely unfamiliar mystical practices of my faith tradition, along with attempting some creative new spiritual experiences, is something I anticipate now rather than avoid at all costs. Where I am in all of this isn't static or standardized. Creating a more meaningful and true spiritual practice that includes living out Kingdom principals in the most literal and direct ways I can in the company of intimate community is the best place I could hope to be.




How do you define your spiritual praxis?

7 comments:

  1. Oh, Joy. You always give me so much to think about and I love love love it.

    Thanks for having the courage to really wrestle with these things in a public way. I am too scared of causing controversy and so for the most part my blog is a rather neutral forum, only whispering around the edges what I really feel and how I truly practice my faith. You inspire me to really get down and dirty with this a little bit more - regardless of the inevitable uncomfortable comment, email or phone call from someone trying to pull me back from the edge!

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  2. Joy,
    Love to hear you pour out your heart. Your words paint a beautiful picture of a journey from: Traditions,Routine,Requirements,Rules,Rituals,Regulations,& Religion
    to:
    Relationship

    May the voices of Truth continue to drown out all the other useless garbage that comes your way. I am so glad I am on this journey with you....

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  3. Thank you friends, for your kind words and support...This process is so intimate for me...While it isn't very hard for me to be honest about what I think and feel...it is hard to expose something for critique and criticism...It's very scarey for me.

    @Sarah airing my dirty laundry and 'raw' honesty are my spiritual gifts... Really! heheheh. I was totally born without a filter. I do try to clean up the swears for the blog though.
    (o:

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  4. Hi Joy--I'm so excited for you! It seems you are looking to the future, and doing so with enthusiasm. What a breakthrough!

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  5. Joy - I love it when you write! It reads just the way you speak. You've hit on some really important things - our spiritual journey has nothing to do with what we do - just for the sake of doing - but instead who we are and what we 'be' in Christ. Our journeys are all different - the path you walk will be different than mine and it is good! God will speak to you with a voice and a way that is different than mine. I have found that the institutional church has lost its eyes for unigueness and individuality. I'm excited about the path in front of you and will continue to ptay for you. You are your name - you bring Joy into life - my life! Thank you

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  6. I'm so glad I got to read this as my first post of yours Joy..... I really 'hear' you. Well --- you asked what was going on with me and I guess I'll just write here, I hope that's okay. God has been doing something.... Basically since 2007 when I had a huge turning point and His Spirit truly became a part of my life and since then I've been on such a different path than those around me in 'real' life. He has given me this passion and vision and dream for real community and I have been running after that since little by little taking tiny slow steps which has lead me from a traditional baptist church to helping start a new church community which I thought was going to truly BE the community God was teaching me about...... but it ended up not being.... and I have gone through a lot of sadness because I LOVE these people --- but I at this point have just come to the realization that this true community can not take place in the same environment/structure that creates busy-ness and other priorities. When the church was being formed the Holy Spirit would send out to me clear messages of what was going to happen if we made THIS decision and I would tell others and it wasn't listened to --- so I really realize that GOd must have been telling them something different and so here I am taking a different path. All this has happened pretty recently and God has blessed me with Kathy Escobar to help me walk through and process some of this. Then I found THrive Ministries and everything I read from him is like my own soul wrote it. I sat there reading from thrive and just crying. It was like God poured my passion and dream He had given me on paper --- which was yesterday. SOOOO that being said... I have no clue what GOd is asking of me. I don't know anybody around me with this same vision/passion. and I AM connected to this community started 6 months ago (as connections director) ... so though I have stepped back from my leadership role and am taking steps to back away.... I haven't gotten a clear green light from God to totally leave these people. I don't know what He is asking of me right now.... except that I had to MOVE. My sight of Him was getting blurry and so I knew I HAD to change position........ anyway --- sorry I wrote so much. that's it very short. thanks for your blog- can't wait to read more! :) blessings,

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